But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
