I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
