Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize