put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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