dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I AM VODKA MAN
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
