drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
