Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
