i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Randomize
