I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
