I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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