You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
