i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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