I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Randomize
