In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Randomize
