I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
the raccoons are back...
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