Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
