I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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