____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
