didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Where did you get a picture of my penis
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize