no, he came in my armpit
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize