You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I think a kid would responsible me up
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
