we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize