Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Can't talk, ducks in the car
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
