I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
