yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
