I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I wish i was in the wii world.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
