U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
you never un-have a 4some
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
