I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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