DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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