When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
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