the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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