i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
