My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
