hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
