love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
