i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
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