I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
