i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
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