so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
