So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
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