thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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