Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
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you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
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