Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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