Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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