i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
