ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
