Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize