i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Randomize