He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Randomize
