He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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