Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
