I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
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